Do My Stretch Marks Gross You Out?

December 10, 2015February 9, 2018 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ Leave a comment

I never got stretch marks when I was pregnant. In fact, I lost so much weight during the pregnancy I weighed less at Alex’s birth than I did in high school. That’s a whole ‘nother story. But, I definitely got more stretch marks in 2015 than in any other recent year. These marks I’m proud to show and tell about

What stretched you in 2015? What’s on your 2016 list for your personal growth and development? I prefer the term stretch marks to resolutions. How about you?

2015 Stretch Marks
1. I learned how to swim-a lifelong goal and one I blogged about in May 2015 under the category “scoliosis.” Nothing gave me more confidence up to that point in 2015 than this achievement. Many thanks to swim instructor, Tonya, for the training, coaching and motivation.
2. I birthed a website and blog in 2015. Like first time parents, this experience stretched me in all kinds of ways. Some days I rejoiced; others I cowered, and yet others I questioned my sanity for thinking I was cut out for this technical adventure. I love written expression and helping others share their stories through written words. For the most part, it’s been a tremendous success. What I quickly learned is writing is only a small part of having a successful website and blog. The technical and marketing aspects are equally, if not greater, in importance. And, I thank you for joining me on this journey and appreciate all the shares, comments and contributions you’ve made along the way. Keep up the good work, and I will do my best too.
3. Along with the website and technical challenges came learning to trust “remote” support professionals, including those in other countries whom I’ve never met or spoken to. It’s amazing how small our world is when one agrees to meet virtually.
4. I took my first online course on writing for the Internet in 2015. And, I did it in the midst of a major family transition. I missed direct interaction with the instructor and students. However, I enjoyed being able to log in when it was most convenient for me and I thoroughly enjoyed the teaching methods. Taking quizzes, contributing to discussion boards and preparing for a final-well those required dusting off cobwebs. Great fun! Great stretch mark. “A” on final.
5. Linda’s store on the website is major stretch mark. First, I had to shoot all the images and prepare them technically so they could be uploaded and then printed on products. Uff-da! That was a lot of work, but worth all of it. I hope you enjoy viewing the images and will consider placing an order through the store. It’s my small business at work and I thank you for supporting it and all other small businesses.
6. Contacting tourism agencies was another noteworthy stretch mark. As the year progressed, it became quite clear that my passion is visiting and promoting mid to small town America. More than that, I thrive on assessing the culture and heartbeat of a community and promoting it to followers who want to venture to and explore off-the-beaten-path places. This requires my cold calling or contacting tourism agencies and chamber of commerce organizations to collaborate with me. If you’d like me to visit your town and promote it to future tourists, tell me whom to contact. I will. I love travel. I love promotion. I love writing and I certainly enjoy seeing small towns gain additional revenue from visitors.
7. My palate was stretched in 2015. I tried Indian and Ethiopian food along with cuisine from Afghanistan and authentic Mexican fare. Thankfully my husband eats what I prepare and we’ve been enjoying expanding our food selections and preparing it in healthier ways. Recipes can be found under that tab on the website.
8. I was able to work with my husband, Ken, again for one night in 2015 as we shared red carpet interviewer roles for a corporate event. We’d worked together for over 20 years before the business was purchased. This one night confirmed my passion for helping others tell their stories, even if only in sound bites on the red carpet. I hadn’t done this type of work in years and the preparation stretched me more than the event did. Once I hit the red carpet, I felt like I was home. I want to do it again!
9. Relocating stretched me in so many ways. I had to let go of “things” to simplify the move and re-learn that what matters most are the people in the room, not the room or the things in it. I’m afraid to say moving was “fun” for fear it will happen sooner rather than later, but approaching another move in 2015 with a different mindset completely de-stressed the process.
10. Home and furnishing purchases considerably stretched me in 2015. Realizing this may be the last time I purchase a house or furnishings touched me at my core. It took longer to find the ideal house because certain features like ranch style were not a choice, but a necessity. Understanding one’s own aging is not for the lighthearted.
11. Other than my own family perhaps, nothing opened my heart more or gave me greater joy in 2015 than being randomly called out to dance with BoyzIIMen during their Las Vegas concert. Despite hosting a website and writing a blog, I am a private person who dances in the kitchen with the curtains drawn. I shun the spotlight at all cost. So, to accept the offer to dance in front of a sold out crowd and have my moves projected on big screens for all to analyze, was definitely a stretchable moment. Accepting the invitation on the spur of the moment rather than waving it off is more meaningful to me than the dancing, though I relished every part of that too.
12. The role shift as a mother stretched me most in 2015. Part of me grieves the loss of nurturing while the other part is purely at peace knowing our son, Alex, has found a partner who loves him equally as his parents. The calls for information, support and conversation have dwindled. I know these now go to the “other woman” in his life. We love her for what she is in Alex’s life and we celebrate the times we share together. Without speaking about it in technical terms, we all know and accept the role shifts, sometimes with more grace than others. My days of caretaking for a son will one day perhaps be reversed and that’s a role shift that will stretch me too.

I’m starting to create my 2016 list. So far I’ve listed: learn to play pickle ball, travel to the Pacific Northwest and visit at least 8 small to mid-sized towns to promote on my blog. Do you have any other suggestions to add? What would you like me to do and then blog about? Please share. I’m open to hearing your suggestions and trying new things, except skydiving that is.

Linda Leier Thomason is a former CEO who writes freelance business and travel stories, along with feature articles. Her work experiences include a Fortune 500 corporation, federal government, entrepreneurship and small business. Find out more about Linda by clicking the “Meet Linda” tab above. Interested in working together? Complete this form below.

After Divorce, Love Liberates

November 6, 2015February 21, 2018 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ Leave a comment

I still love my ex-husband.

(Contributed by Maureen-an Oregon follower.)

I love him like a recovering alcoholic loves her drink of choice – with fond memories, from a great distance, and with absolutely no desire to rekindle. Sobriety has gifted her with wisdom to understand the chaos of such reunion. The problem isn’t with the alcohol or the alcoholic. The problem is when they are in a relationship together.

Co-Parent

My ex and I both love our children with fierce dedication. He’s an excellent co-parent: He returns my calls and gladly lets me borrow needed items. The lines of communication about our kids and their needs are very open. We cooperate while also maintaining healthy, new boundaries set after the divorce because, when children are involved, divorce does not end a relationship, it only changes it.

In fact, we filed for divorce together, submitting a stipulated judgment reached in agreement through mediation. The legal part was fast. It was reaching this point that was painfully slow and exhausting. After several rounds of pastoral and secular counseling, both as a couple, and individually, and only God knows how many tears and best efforts, I could state without reservation there was nothing left to try, no more effort to make.

Filed on Anniversary

By coincidence, we filed for divorce on July 8 – our anniversary – so, poetically, 14 years to the day we ended our marriage on the same day it began. Officially, the judgment was entered into the record six days later, but who’s nitpicking? That would mess up the way I’ve chosen to remember things.

And that’s the scary, and the beautiful part. It is my choice to remember things how I want to. Some may say I’m lying to myself, but we all lie to ourselves, all the time. I’ve chosen to stop hoping things could’ve been different. Rather, I’m grateful for how things are, which is the best definition of forgiveness I’ve found. I could list his failings and the compounded disappointments leading me to finally decide there was no hope for a shared future. But, then to be fair, I’d have to provide a list of mine. I don’t want to.

Imperfect

I was not perfect. I did things I am not proud of. Words were shouted. Names were called. Doors were slammed. Tires were squealed. Spit was spat. Yes, we’d known for years we were making each other miserable. I also knew if we split, he’d stay alone for approximately five seconds. I understood a separation would be permanent. I solved the problem of being forced to make this decision by lying in bed and crying about it for two years.

Support System

When I finally reached out to my friends, my sister, and my parents, their reactions told me I had no more time for such indulgences. They assured me they’d be there every step of the way and that if I returned to him without a full reckoning by both of us; they’d be forced to accept they could never take me at my word again. I knew once I started to share the truth of how far my marriage had gone off the rails, they’d expect me, and hope for me, to choose to do right by myself and my children. I fondly called this the Nuclear Option – drastic and irreversible, once begun.

On December 3, 2013, with the help of my sister and my parents – who could have so easily said, “I told you so,” but instead swooped in like a professionally trained search and rescue team, I pushed the red button by moving out and everything, I mean everything, has been better.

Circle of Stones

The process itself was brutal. Maybe I should say I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but that isn’t true. Life is full of pain and disappointment and the sooner one acknowledges it, the easier it gets. Everyone is carrying their own sack of rocks, why whine about mine? Instead, I put together a team I fondly called my Circle of Stones. The inner circle was my sister and my parents, and my dear friend, Mindy, who was the first to be told and the first to withhold judgment. I honestly don’t know where I’d be if she hadn’t been the perfect friend to me in the exact time and way I needed her to be. Her nonjudgmental response gave me courage to reach out to my family – a family that, through my silence and shame of feeling like a failure, I’d metaphorically been giving the finger for over a decade.

Added to the Circle were my brothers and their wives, whose humbling, unexpected and greatly appreciated generosity arrived exactly when I needed it. Donna, Ellen, Debbi, Marta – a.k.a “My West Coast Mom,” Jim, Andrea, Ree, Char and so many others joined the Circle as did my doctor. She wisely put me on a short round of antidepressants when I asked her for something to help me sleep. And then, at just the right time, I learned of a reunion of female first cousins, some whom I’d never met or seen in over 30 years. Being with these strong, beautiful, caring women buoyed me, reminded of the stuff I was made of, helped me remember where I came from, and gave me the support and perspective I needed. It’s taken time, counseling, grief and being embraced by this Circle but yes, I still do love my ex-husband.

Love is an Active Choice

Mr. Rogers in his book The World According to Mr. Rogers said, “Love isn’t perfect caring. It is an active noun, like struggle.” It is an active choice to behave in such a way that is beneficial and nurturing to all involved. Dr. Maya Angelou is credited with saying, “love liberates”. So it is my choice to love myself, my children and my now ex-husband enough to liberate, or set us all free.

I also choose to stop hoping things could’ve been different and instead be grateful for how things are. Rather than dragging my bag of rocks, I stand solidly inside my Circle of Stones and know I am forgiven, I am free.

We all are – or at least we can be. We only have to choose to liberate.

Want to share a message with or ask Maureen a question? Do so below.

If you’d like to be a guest contributor, please contact me.

©Copyright. November 2015. Linda Leier Thomason

School Shooting In Rural America

October 30, 2015October 30, 2015 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ Leave a comment

First Year Teacher Shares Incident Experience

Sarah is a first year teacher and daughter of a veteran police officer. She knew of crime but never realized she’d be so close to a shooting until a student opened fire inside her school during her 1st month on the job. This is Sarah’s account of September 30, 2015 in rural Harrisburg, South Dakota, population 5000.

I’ll never forget this day. I was supervising a study hall of diligent students when just after 10:00 AM; the intercom came on with static and white noise. Quickly following was the administrative assistant’s voice saying, “We are in lockdown. We are in lockdown.” She did not yell, but panic was heard in her voice. In fact, still today, over and over in my head, I hear how she said those words. Instantly I knew this was not a drill. Instead, a real incident was happening somewhere in the school.

Immediately I instructed my classroom of 25 students to get as close to the back wall as possible so they were not in direct site from the door. As they moved, I ran to shut and lock the door, turn the lights off and close all the shades. The next few minutes of uncertainty felt like an eternity. Students rightfully asked if this was a drill and what was going on. I had no answers. Finally our principal, who I later learned had just been shot, came on the intercom announcing the person causing the lockdown was apprehended and authorities were enroute.

All breathed a sigh of relief knowing with near certainty we were no longer in danger. Then I realized my loved ones, who’d in all likelihood heard about
the shooting, were probably trying to find out if I was okay, only I didn’t
have my cellular phone. For once, I was thankful for social media because I took to Facebook to contact my friends and family, letting them know that my students and I were safe.

I was on the job a month when this incident happened. I never imagined having to follow active shooter procedures ever while teaching, let alone in the first month of my career. The staff had practiced a lockdown drill just two weeks prior to the shooting so I knew what to do in the classroom that day and automatically did as we were taught.

September 30th I became a more confident teacher. Confidence in the classroom and relationship building with students typically come with time and success. Ironically, this experience jump-started both. I know, if faced with a similar incident, I will be confident in my actions. That morning those 25 students and I bonded and I feel closer to them now then I think most teachers in their first month of their first year could wish for.

I will admit that on the day of the shooting I really didn’t have any feelings about it. But the next day, when seeing the students and our principal, who thankfully was only slightly injured, I was overwhelmed by the enormity of what happened and the realization of how it could have been much worse for all.

October 1, 2015 when I got home from school, I learned of the Oregon college campus shooting and what happened the day before at our school really hit me hard. I thought to myself how easily that could have been my school, and my students. Yes, all of us at Harrisburg High School went through a traumatic event but it could have been a tragic event as well.

I was thankful then that I am close to my family. Some of my co-worker’s families live in other states and could only communicate through telephone or text messaging. I was lucky enough to have my family in the same city, offering me support and talking me through this incident.

I believe one of the biggest factors in this situation was that the student doing the shooting was new to the school. No one really had a chance to know him. And it is hard to say why he chose to use this act of violence with the limited background information we had on him.

What I can say is that parents should always be mindful of what their teenagers are doing and who they are hanging out with. As a sister to a brother seven years younger, I know keeping tabs on teenagers can be challenging because they don’t always want to talk to their parents. As a teacher I try to develop relationships right away with my students so they feel comfortable opening up to me about their struggles in and outside of school.

I don’t know if I am really the right person to dispense warning signs indicating a child might be considering an act of violence. I will say parents should try their best to be involved in their children’s lives and to pay attention to how they normally act. If abrupt change is noticed, it would be best for all to sit down right away and talk about it. As a teacher, and also someone who not too long ago was a teenager, I do know students absolutely want their parents to be involved and to talk to them, even though they may appear resistant and non-receptive.

Today I feel safe at Harrisburg High School. How I enter the school and go about my day has not changed. Honestly, being in lockdown was the last thing I ever expected when I decided to be a teacher. Yet, September 30, 2015 changed so many things for me. Teaching is as much about my learning as it is educating my students. That day I both taught and learned and I’m more confident for the experience.
What message would you like to convey to Sarah and all teachers? Leave a comment below.

©Copyright. October 2015. Linda Leier Thomason

If you’d like to contribute as a guest, contact me at llthomason60@gmail.com.

Check Under the Hood

October 22, 2015 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ 1 Comment

I bought a 4-door silver Plymouth Fury in 1979. I bought after being without wheels as a college freshman and relying on others for rides. Dad decided I needed to learn how to change a tire, open the hood and “check under the hood.” To this day I’m not exactly sure what I was checking for other than if there was enough oil and if it was clear. I went through the motions to make him feel better about sending me on the highway, praying I’d never have to really use the lessons he was teaching. Luckily, I’ve only been stranded once and it wasn’t for anything under the hood. It was a flat tire fixed by a kind farmer on North Dakota’s Interstate 94.

“Check under the hood” has stuck with me but the meaning isn’t as literal as the initial lesson taught that hot August afternoon on the farm’s gravel driveway. Instead it’s come to mean maintenance and protecting one’s investment. And as I age, holy smokes, I’m doing a lot of “checking under the hood.” So much so that some days I’d like to invest in a new model, one with fewer maintenance issues. And, I’m not talking about the vehicle either. Rather my body. Relate?

Today my annual physical is much like a 100,000 mile vehicle check. It takes a whole day and involves looking at everything from front to back to top to bottom. What needs further testing? What needs repair? What needs replacement? Question the recommendation. Get a second opinion. Make another appointment. See a specialist. Extract a part. Import a part. Sticker shock! Yikes! You get it.

Despite all this, I keep “checking under the hood.” I drive my vehicles until the wheels fall off-that’s a whole ‘nother story. Warren Buffet and I share that in common-if it ain’t broke-why replace it? Begrudgingly I schedule annual physicals, dental appointments and other wellness exams each time hoping to leave doing my best impersonation of a smiling Mary Tyler Moore tossing her hat jubilantly in the air celebrating life and all its glory.

“You’re gonna make it after all”…just keep “checking under the hood.”

Are You Listening?

October 15, 2015March 7, 2016 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ Leave a comment

Waking Early To the Amazing Sights & Sounds of Nature

Awakened by a symphony of birds in the backyard.

Even the wind chimes remained motionless not to disturb the bird songs. — Wind chimes remained motionless so as not to disturb the music.

The setting was brilliant in the early morning sunrise. — Brilliant setting in morning sunrise.

The fountain provided background music. — The fountain provided background sounds.

Apparently I wasn't the only one listening. — All welcome to listen.

All were drawn to the sounds. — The diverse audience amused me.

Robin duet was extra special. — Eager to join the group.

I was just going to open the screen door and allow some fresh, crisp, early morning, fall air into the house as I pushed through my morning routine. Instead, I was drawn to a symphony performed by a mix of birds and an equally diverse audience. I grabbed my camera to capture the event, now wishing I’d have turned on the recorder and captured the sounds. It was a great lesson in pausing to listen. Had I not been so drawn to the variety of bird sounds, I’d have missed the event and all the surrounding activity and beauty.

What else is missed when not pausing to listen?

Pause. Look. Listen.

Life passes by too quickly not to appreciate magical moments.

Looking for more images like these, check out “Linda’s Store”. Any of these photographs can be placed on products to use yourself or gift to others. As a small business owner, I appreciate your support.

1st Time Grandparents

October 13, 2015February 20, 2018 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ 5 Comments

JOYS AND FEARS

(Guest Contributor-Kelly Weaver)

Updated March 29, 2016

Lennon Elizabeth arrived one week early on Sunday, March 20^th at 7:05 pm weighing 5 lbs. 15 oz and measuring 18 ¾ inches long. She is a beautiful healthy baby and everything is going well. Kelly said, “I was not prepared for the love in my heart for that little girl and I cried when I held her (as did my mother!).” Adding, “You hear that being a grandparent is the best, but you don’t truly know until you are there. I look forward to the many moments of joy she will bring to our lives.”

Share your messages of Congratulations with Kelly and her family in the Comments Section below.

———————————————————————————————-October, 2015

This summer our daughter and son-in-law made an announcement that took my breath away and, somewhat unexpectedly, brought me to tears. They’re pregnant! This will be our first grandchild. While I am excited, I feel a bit unprepared for my new role but I guess I will figure it out along the way. Just like I did as a parent! Like any change in life, embarking on this new journey brings with it both fears and joys.
Fears –
1. My husband’s biggest fear is that the baby won’t be healthy or our daughter will have complications. He had the same fear when I was pregnant with her. Given that she’s been feeling well, as I did during my pregnancy, and extreme complications are rare, this is one fear that doesn’t keep me up at night. I’m more worried about how their puppy will react.
2. I think my biggest fear is not overstepping my bounds and being “that” mother/mother-in-law. Our daughter and her husband only live a couple of miles from us, and we have a great relationship. I have always been the parent that couldn’t wait to share all my knowledge and wisdom with my daughter as she was growing up. I will need to police those tendencies and perhaps bite my lip at times when new methods don’t match up with the ‘way it used to be’.
3. Selfishly, I am embarrassed to admit one of my fears is a possible loss of freedom. My husband and I are just becoming used to being ‘empty nesters’ and taking opportunities to do things we haven’t done for a while or doing things as just the two of us. Will being a Grandma take away from other leisure time activities? I shouldn’t be worried based on what I hear from other grandparents. We’ll likely find that we can choose ‘Grandma and Grandpa time’ over any other activity.
I am blessed that there are many fears I do not have. I don’t worry about family discord, being separated by long distances, or having my grandchild raised in a different faith tradition.
Joys –
1. My daughter and her husband celebrated their first wedding anniversary this fall. While she hasn’t lived in our house for a few years, it’s been a transition of separation since the wedding. It’s been wonderful to witness her in her new fully adult role as a wife. The joy of seeing her as a mother will be even greater. That joy will be compounded by the fact that she will be accompanied in that journey by a loving husband ready to take on his role as a new father. What more could a parent ask for?
2. My husband is so looking forward to the things he can do with his grandchild. His first favorite thing will be snuggling up on the couch with a sleeping child reminiscent of the times when our daughter was young. Of course, other activities on his list will be camping, fishing, hunting, snowmobiling, and trips to Storybook Land.
3. I too look forward to activities with our grandchild because it allows us to be a positive influence in their life. To share our faith, to be awed by their outlook on the world, to encourage them to be themselves, and to be their biggest fan. I think one of the joys of grandparenthood comes from being able to ‘be present’ in their world in a way that parents are not always able to be. We have a calm demeanor that comes from life experience and the lack of responsibility for the daily duties of raising a child.
I remember when my daughter was born and my father held her for the first time. He was so in awe of this little being and how everything about her was so tiny. He was particularly enthralled with her delicate fingers. Granted, it had been a long time since his own children were born but it was almost as if he had never seen a baby before. He often said, “If I had known how much fun grandchildren were, I would have had them first! “
With that in mind, I can only hope to approach the birth of my own grandchild with a sense of wonder and joy. (And it will be fun to see my dad’s reaction to his first great-grandchild!)

Kelly Weaver lives in Aberdeen, South Dakota and spends her days helping people in northeast South Dakota realize their small business dreams by providing guidance and business planning services. For the past 9 years, she has coordinated the BIG Idea Competition, a business idea competition for high school students. In her free time she enjoys singing in her church choir and camping and snowmobiling with family and friends throughout the year. She and her husband, Jim, have one daughter and son-in-law and are anxiously and excitingly waiting the arrival of their first grandchild.

Share this message with others. Comment below.

©Copyright. October 2015. Linda Leier Thomason

Replaced Mom?

October 12, 2015 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ 1 Comment

Google-the Nasty Step-Mother

Soon no one will speak any longer. Texts, emails, Facebook, Twitter and other social media have nearly replaced telephone calls. A hand-addressed, hand-written letter in the mailbox has me rushing back to the house excited to read words committed on paper forever.

Long gone are the days when I made, or more recently received, phone calls about ingredient substitutions for a family recipe, remedies for an illness or techniques for stain removal. Nope! No one calls for that advice or wisdom any longer. Instead, we log onto one of our many electronic devices and ask Google. Google is the end-all and the answer key for virtually everything we need to know. It is the nasty step-mother who’s replaced mom’s wisdom. It’s left mom feeling worthless and not needed. Heck, even mom Googles when she needs information now.

What’s missing from this instantaneous Google search for answers and information is the appreciation of experience and wisdom of the elder being called who knows the right answers through the trials and errors of living life. Every time I hung up the phone (Phones haven’t always been carried.) after calling to ask a household or vehicle operating question, I was grateful for the answer and deep down I knew it gave my parents a boost to be able to answer and to help. It proved their worth, even as their child aged.

Recently our son called to ask how to dispose of kitchen grease. I answered. And then I got suspicious. What was the real reason he was calling? Was everything okay? Was he lonely? Did something happen? Oh Dear! Maybe he just wanted to know how to get rid of the grease that was smelling up his apartment.

I wish he’d call more often with questions I can answer without looking them up on Google. If only he knew how that one little ring on my cellular phone boosted my sense of worth as a mother. Save the texts and instant messages for someone else. Today, let the phone ring or the mailbox contain a hand-written letter.

Need to know how to write one? Call me!

©Copyright October 2015 Linda Leier Thomason

Breast Cancer Survivor Pleads-Get Checked!

September 29, 2015October 8, 2020 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ Leave a comment

October: Breast Cancer Awareness Month

The 5-year relative survival rate is 100 percent when breast cancer is detected early in the localized stage (American Cancer Society). Please schedule your mammogram today.

(Guest Contributor- Deanne Leier)

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and I’m urging readers to schedule their mammogram and to encourage loved ones to do the same. For some it may be a matter of life and death. The earlier the cancer is found, the better the outcome.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 39. Doing a breast self-exam, I found something I questioned and at my scheduled mammogram, it was confirmed-I had breast cancer. Most people think age 39 is too young to receive a cancer diagnosis. However, in my family it appears that the magic number, or should I say the “unlucky” number, is age 39! My grandmother and mother were both 39 when they were diagnosed. Understanding my family history and being very diligent about having a yearly mammogram saved my life.

I cannot stress enough to all women out there-Let the month of October-Breast Cancer Awareness Month- be your reminder to schedule a mammogram, sooner rather than later. Some women may think it’s not worth the pain to get this done. From my experience I can share that the minimal pain from a mammogram is nothing compared to the surgery and 8 rounds of chemotherapy treatments that I had to endure. Minimal pain for peace of mind or immediate treatment is worth it. Schedule your mammogram today.

All too familiar with breast cancer, 4 of us founded Pink It Forward. Two cousins and I have fought and beaten breast cancer and my daughter, Kayla, has witnessed it. We all have a passion for raising awareness and are dedicated to helping those in need. When we learn of someone fighting breast cancer, we assemble a care package and mail it, hoping it provides comfort during the fight. If you, or someone you know, is going through treatments, please visit www.pinkitforward.net and submit a request. We will take care of the rest from Fargo, North Dakota!

Wondering how these care packages and programs are funded? Pink It Forward currently receives funds via free-will donations, Pink It Forward merchandise sales and Pink It Forward sponsored events.

We are thankful to many communities that invite our organization in and allow us to share our mission. This has allowed Pink It Forward to visit with those who have received our packages and learn about their journeys.

Click Pink It Forward and then “Donate” to make a donation.

Thank you for scheduling your mammogram and encouraging others to do the same. Thank you for visiting our website and for supporting our work of caring for others with breast cancer.

If you’d like to leave a message for Deanne or her non-profit (501c3) organization, you may do so in the comment box below. Donations are accepted through their website.

3 F’s of Unemployment

September 24, 2015 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ Leave a comment

Awhile back our family was anticipating an employment and relocation change. I found this beautiful verse that today is framed and in our family room as a reminder of what has been, what will be and what can be endured.

Life does not stand still.

Change is constant.

It comes by chance, by choice or by force

but come it will…come it will.

Only character and faith can guide

for they are the anchor and the compass

in ever changing lives.

Jon and Amy share what has guided them in their recent unwanted career changes. Each relies heavily on faith, family & friends. Read their stories and tips for staying positive through change. Share this with others going through a career or job change.

Contributed by Jon May from Ohio.

Finding yourself out of work or unemployed can be both scary and overwhelming no matter where you’re at in your career. I was a Human Resources professional for 20+ years and it was my job to help others understand the reasons for changes in their employment status. Now for the first time in my career, because of a merger, I have to face this challenge myself. If you’re in the same boat, please understand the role work plays in our identity.

• It makes us feel worthy, proud and significant.
• Work gives us a sense of achievement in providing something worthwhile for others.
• Work shapes our personal growth and development, and
• Work provides us sufficient finances to adequately meet our needs.

During this time of self-examination and transition, one must also spend quality time with God to ensure where He wants you to go and what He wants you to be doing. “… to rejoice in His labor; this is the gift of God” (Ecclesiastes 5:9). Remember, the creation never dictates to the creator what they are purposed to accomplish in their life.
Finally, I offer 5 steps for dealing with career transitions:
1. Allow yourself some down time to reconnect with family & friends, seek spiritual and emotional support and discern your next steps.
2. Take full advantage of outplacement services offered by your previous employer. These services will provide support on resume development, LinkedIn profiles and networking.
3. Redefine and write down your goals for income, location, industry, etc. These will guide you in working towards your next opportunity.
4. Stay motivated and active. Keep moving to make progress so you don’t get discouraged or become complacent.
5. Be open to different opportunities such as project or consulting work and/or part time work. Doing so will not only continue to hone your skills but also the next person you network with may be a great connection for your next career opportunity.

Jon May is a 20+ years Human Resources executive. He’s been married 25 years to his bride Meredith. He is the father of Jordan, a college junior, and Joshua, a high school junior. Jon has a passion for coaching and developing others and helping them find what God has called them to accomplish as part of their career and life assignment. Jon enjoys spending time with family, fishing, exercising and offering support to his church’s budget committee.

Contributed by guest blogger Amy Davis of Alabama.

“Losing your job is not the end of the world – you’ll find something”. This was the first thing my sister-in-law told me as I shared the devastating news of being jobless again. I’ve worked 80 hour weeks since I can remember, so when I’m not working, it does feel like the end of the world. My entire existence changed in an instant. One day I was working the usual 12 hour day, and the next day there was complete silence. The silence – that is the hardest part – it is where one’s faith and common sense are tested daily.
I now know that my sister-in-law was absolutely correct. Hers probably aren’t the words I would choose, but she wanted me to see the big picture. Often times, our close friends and family know us better than we know ourselves. It is very easy to question everything about yourself and move into that vicious cycle of self-loathing when you lose your job. Simple tasks such as reviewing your resume or LinkedIn profile become a battle-one between a confident winner and the newly-born skeptic sure everyone sees you as a failure. When you surround yourself with the love of your faith, family, and friends, simple tasks become simple again and there seems to be a purpose to life.
Do you have a friend like this? One who reminds you God is there to take your worries or that you are an intelligent and good person? As soon as I start telling one of my friends I don’t know if I was cut out to work anymore, she reminds me of the good life I have and how I have so much to offer. My husband was the first person to tell me we will be okay; we can make it work with some sacrifices. He listens to me whine when I see another rejection email and reminds me I didn’t have my first interview until after applying for a month the last time I lost my job.
Most importantly (to me), my church friends have prayed for and with me countless times. They have helped me remember how to turn my worries over to God – through prayer and my faith.

My biggest epiphany has been that God has placed all of these people and circumstances into my life with a purpose. With my faith, every task is possible and anything is doable. I am so grateful for all of the doorstops (my friends and family) He has placed in my path as a reminder that everything will be okay.

As it turns out, I’m now pursuing what I have always loved doing and I’m writing my heart out. Losing my job is not the end of my world.

Amy Davis is a freelance writer with a background in instructional design, training program management and consulting who lives near Birmingham, Alabama with her husband and teenage son. Her passion for writing began at an early age through journaling and grew with her into her career. Amy’s metaphoric approach to writing is a true representation of her personality and approach to life.

See more at http://reinventamy.blogspot.com/.

Leave a word of encouragement, ask a question or seek advice from Jon & Amy in the Comments Section below. Have you lost a job? What did you rely on to move forward? How have Jon & Amy’s messages impacted you? Comment and share.

If you’d like to be considered as a guest contributor, email me at llthomason60@gmail.com.

BIG Life on North Dakota Farm

August 26, 2015August 27, 2018 ~ Linda Leier Thomason ~ 1 Comment

DSC_0053.1 — Klarisa Glasser, Photographer

By guest contributor-Bonnie Schantz.
Farming is big in North Dakota, and so is family. And when something big is about to happen on a ND farm, it causes a lot of excitement. BIG for me is when all our kids and grand kids gather, especially since one of the twins lives 3000 miles away and hasn’t been back for two years.

For this reunion trip back to ND, Michael’s carrying more than his backpack from Boston: his wife and our 9-month-old grandson are in tow. We’re truly blessed as parents and grandparents as nothing makes my husband, Chester, and I happier than when our “chickens come home to roost.”
Our children enjoy spending time together. Our eldest son, Jordan, who lives an hour away from our farm moved his camper here so his family could spend more time here and less on the road. Amanda’s family commuted 70 miles between Bismarck and the farm.
Little did we know that our reunion would be disrupted by big events. Despite these, we stuck together, laughed through each and created lifetime memories. It started out with a six row honeycomb discovered on the corner of the house. As a farmer’s wife, it saddened me to see the local bee keeper destroy this because of the severe bee shortage, essential to pollination. But to protect the grandchildren around the house, he advised us that capturing bees in a wooden hive would take days and could be dangerous for the kids. So, it was destroyed.
Insects are apparently attracted to my family. Shortly after Michael arrived, he was repeatedly texting his physician. Finally he admitted he had a blood test before leaving and just learned he tested positive for Lyme Disease, though he never found a bite on his body. So, he made a ‘beeline’ to the local pharmacy for his 21 day treatment. Oh boy!
Michael wasn’t the only one facing health challenges during the homecoming. Chester, 67, became ill three weeks before everyone arrived. He suffered with a high fever and body aches for days. Even after a couple of trips to the ER, the local doctor remained stumped. Antibiotics, lots of fluids and two and a half weeks of bed rest helped nurse him back to better health. Though weak, he was able to enjoy the family gathering, sneaking in a nap or two. Having his kids and grand kids home was enough for Chester to jump off the farm equipment and tend to his health-a rare behavior near harvest time.

Not certain as to when all 12 will be able to gather again, I couldn’t let this time go by without capturing photos of our togetherness on the family farm. Our house never would have worked as a backdrop because it looked like a closet exploded while getting everyone ready for the photographer to arrive. All willingly agreed to do the photo session outdoors and since farming is our heritage, we included a few rusty old junk yard tractors.

On Sunday we invited extended family and hosted a potluck for 33, which included frying fleishkeukle (German beef pocket) on the patio. Lloyd, my brother-in-law, offered to bring a deep fryer and be the chef since Michael requested it. That is what German Russian families do-celebrate family with food, including German potato salad. As I watched everyone interacting, my heart was full and ready to burst. This was my big family sharing a big meal, and I never felt more pride as the mother and oldest sister of this group.
After five nights it was time to take the travelers to the airport. Hugs and kisses were exchanged and a little of my heart went with them. I didn’t get time to be sad, as I had laundry and cleaning to do as I prepared to watch Jordan’s two kids while he and his wife attended the 75th Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. They play so well together and I treasure listening, watching and sometimes joining in. I let them jump in the mud puddles after it rained, ride bike, dance to a Michael Jackson tape and make a fort out of lawn chairs. In between I would send up a prayer for a safe return of their parents. The excitement of the previous week continued with the discovery of three bats in our glass enclosed fireplace. The day after, the dishwasher broke.
That’s life on a ND farm. It’s been a hectic six weeks with lots of activity-bees, Lyme Disease, sick husband, bats in the fireplace, broken dishwasher and even a broken ceiling fan. But as Chester said, “At least we’re still alive!” That’s why I love him. He has ND farmer perspective. All the family was together. He feels better, as does Michael who returned safely to Massachusetts. The grand kids didn’t even have a scrape on them when their motorcycle-riding parents returned from South Dakota. I cherished this extra time with my grand kids and secretly shed a tear when I overheard him read a story to his younger sister. Does this mean my bedtime story reading days are over?
I know some believe North Dakota is a wide open prairie with nothing to do. That’s okay. For me, North Dakota is a big farming state with big families with big hearts. I was happy to have mine all gathered around me, even as I prepare to gather a big harvest to feed this big country.
Bonnie Huber Schantz is a chic farmer’s wife of 44 years, living with Chester on their 6000 acre grain farm near Hebron, ND. She is the mother of three, including a set of twins, and grandmother of four. She is Chester’s support, doing payroll, monthly expense accounting, taking hot meals to six men in the field at harvest, helping maintain the 6 acre farmstead and motoring to their “retirement” home in Bismarck to mow the lawn. She enjoys the freedom of being able to be fill-in day-care for the grand kids and watching the 4th segment of the Today Show, while enjoying a good cup of coffee.

If you would like to be considered a guest contributor, contact me:

Linda Leier Thomason

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